Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Should Black Women Give Up On Black Men?
As of late, I've read numerous articles relating to black love and ultimately the alarming statistics about single black women. In reading these articles, one thing has rang true on each and every article, it seems that black men are MUCH more open to dating outside of their race than black women. We are loyal to our black men, we love them, we crave their attention, we crave them. Now, I'm not saying that there aren't black women out there who have decided to step outside their race, because some certainly have and have found true love and happiness. However, I am saying (and this is just from my own personal experiences) most black women want a black man. Black love seems to be on the decline though and I think there are so many issues that play into that. For one, most of us were raised in single parent (usually single mom) homes and were taught we had to be strong willed and independent, learn to make it on our own. The problem arises though when we try to get in a relationship with each other and since we've both been taught to be tough, we bump heads and neither of us is willing to back down. Not to mention that black women outnumber black men, there are alarming numbers of black men in jail, and definitely not enough black men in college, and it is also noted that media and even those around us portray black men as animalistic creatures who can not control their hormones. I also want to say that I am not trying to place all the blame on black men because I do realize that we black women have our faults, too. We're portrayed as angry, confrontational, demanding, and uncompromising. It has been said that many black women just don't know how to treat black men, we don't show them enough love. The real issue, I believe, is that our family structure has been broken, that's a topic for another post though... So, my question is this, since black men don't seem to be as loyal to black women as black women are to them, should we give up on them? Since they don't seem to be putting as many rings on our fingers as they are babies in our tummies, should we look else where for love?
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It does seem like we're fighting a losing battle when it come to black men. I have this friend who says that he has never been able to see himself with a black woman. He says we are too opinonated, too indenpendent,and that we as black women do not know how to let the black man be a man. He maybe right. but I believe just as he says that times have changed, and black men need to accept that and learn to meet us half way. I would like to say no don't give up on a black man, but the way they act towards us makes it impossiable for me to do so.
ReplyDeleteI was raised with the notion that I should stay with my own race and I know that that played a major role in my decision not to date outside my race. I LOVE black men and I am married to one. I don't think that black women should give up on black men. There are some good men out there.
ReplyDeleteJM. I think that there still good black men out there and that black women should not give up on tryin to find a good one but at the same time I feel like its nothin wrong with explorin different races cause to me love is love. If that nigga treat you good and give you what you need it shouldnt matter the color of the nigga skin.
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