Are White Men More Faithful Than Black Men?

Ok, so, that question is one I come to wonder about more often as of late. I always hear about black men cheating and staying out all night, just plain doing their women wrong, however, to that same token, it seems that white men's indiscretions aren't as widely discussed. Now, don't get me wrong, I HAVE heard multiple stories of white men cheating and doing wrong, too, but what I'm saying is I don't hear those types of things as often. I've often heard that "all men are dogs", but there are many different breeds of dogs which leads me to wonder if black men and white men are dogs of different breeds. Just saying, seems white men get married more often, they provide for their families more often, they just seem to be more... Put together. And again let me clarify something, I'm not saying that there aren't black men out there who provide for, protect, and love their families to the very best of their abilities because I have definitely seen great examples of that. There are exceptions to every rule, not every man is the same and you can't say that just because someone is of a particular race they are a certain way. All I'm asking is, in your experience or from your observations, do you think white men are more faithful? Maybe I need to venture out more to different parts of the world and view different cultures in order to learn that black men ARE in fact great partners IN GENERAL and that they CAN truly be faithful...

Is It Selfish To Put Yourself First?

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and I know that there are people who will be on the opposing end of this post. Deciding who may potentially become your child's mother or father is the first decision you make as a parent. However, no matter if you are with that person six months or six years before having a child, you can not foresee the future or predict how the relationship will turn out. When a child becomes involved, things become increasingly complicated and if things are going south, it can be extremely hard to decide whether or not to part ways with your mate. I have said before and I will say again that I believe you should NOT stay JUST for the kid(s). Your happiness is vital to your child(ren)'s happiness. After all, children are more intuitive than we give them credit for. Now, I know some people feel it is selfish to put your happiness on the forefront once children are involved, but know that your child(ren) learn first from watching you. If you are in a relationship that is toxic, DON'T STAY THERE! If your partner is showing signs of disrespect, disregard, unfaithfulness, etc and you feel their behavior is unacceptable, LEAVE! Leave and give your child(ren) a chance to see what a healthy relationship looks like, how a man should treat a woman, how a woman should treat a man. If you end up remaining single, teach them about having standards and also about becoming what they want to attract. Try models of healthy relationships to take them around. It is NOT selfish to put yourself first, in fact, in these types of situations, putting yourself first will benefit not only you, but your kid(s).

Could You Stay If You Were Sexually Incompatible?

So... Yeah, I'm writing again. LOL Anyways, we all know, or at least we SHOULD all know, what we want from our mates when it comes to sex. Are you someone who likes to try new things? Sex toys? Public places? Are you more of a person who likes to keep it simple? Same positions? Same place? Ask yourself these questions. Now think about your mate. What type of person is he/she sexually? Are you guys on the same page sexually? Okay, so now that we've thought about that, let me explain what I mean by sexually incompatible. In my mind, sexually incompatibility would be where one partner feels being adventurous in bed is the way to go while the other partner feels keeping it plain and simple is the way. Or maybe one partner is ready to get it on any time day or night 24/7 while the other partner likes it maybe every other week or so. Now, there are in fact ways to work on this issue. You could try sex therapy, slowly introducing sex toys or porn, you could try expressing to your partner your wants and needs, to name a few. Sex, I feel, is a big part of relationships, however, it isn't the only part of relationships nor is it the most important. So, what you'd next need to ask yourself is, do you really want to deal with a partner you are not sexually compatible with? Could you deal with that? I mean, really, do you think the issue could be resolved?

Let He Who Is Without Sin...

Ok, so, I know I'm late with this, but I am just now taking the time to read about the controversy concerning Kandi Burruss putting out a gospel track featuring Marvin Sapp titled Prayed Up. Here is my take on that, we ALL have faults and have made mistakes and have things in our pasts that we are not necessarily proud of and regardless to whether or not it involved sex, it was NOT pleasing to God and we knew it. I say that to say "let he who is WITHOUT sin cast the first stone". I know some people are saying you shouldn't straddle the fence or in other words you shouldn't be broadcasting your life of sin for the world to see while putting out songs praising God/Christianity, but on that, I would have to agree with a comment someone wrote on another website, her walk with God is HERS alone. God is the ONLY one who has a heaven or hell to put her in. He is the ONLY one who should judge her. We should be looking at the message, NOT the messenger as NO man is perfect or free from some type of sin.

Are Men Really The "Sensitive" Ones?

I have pondered this issue before and even posed the question to my friends on Facebook; do you think men are more insecure than women? Are men really the ones who are sensitive? I ask these questions, more recently due to something I read in a book. The character, Chante' was looking in the dictionary to see if there was a male equivalent for any of the derogatory terms defined for women. Words like slut and whore. She did not, however find any such male equivalents leading her to say that men "dish it, but can't take it". After reading those words, I began to think, you know... There are a lot of things that can "bruise a man's ego" or hurt his "pride". I'll give you a few examples to think about; obviously, if a woman has had more sexual partners, if a woman makes more money, if a woman has more education, if a woman is better at doing something men are "supposed" to be good at just to name a few. Now, don't get me wrong, I know that there are men out there who are so secure within themselves that these things may not bother them one bit, BUT I know that there are, of course, those guys out there who will feel less of a man being with a woman who possesses any of these characteristics. And yes, I also know that there are women who could be just as insecure about these things, but this post isn't about that. Anyway, those were just a few of my thoughts.

Don't Let Yourself Go

Whenever we get into a relationship and that relationship becomes long termn we all have a tendency to get comfortable and let ourselves "go". But if we want things to continue going good for us, we have to remember that what we in order to catch him or her is what we need to do to keep his/her attention. If you used to dress up for no reason in the beginning, you should continue to do so. If you brought her little surprises "just because" in the beginning then you should continue to do so. It's like I always say, spice things up a bit. Variety is the spice of life. Stop doing the same ole things every weekend. Stop eating at the same ole restaurants every night. Dress up, get your hair done/cut like you use to. Keep yourself up. Continue to exercise. Continue to do all the things that got your significant other to fall in love with you.

Give Love To Get Love

It's Valentine's Day!!! I know that some of you are rolling your eyes or feeling angry or maybe even sad because you're single and this day is notorious for being all about couples. I also know that some of you don't believe in celebrating Valentine's Day although you are in a relationship because you feel you don't need a day set aside to show love, you do that year round. However, I am here to ask that everyone just show love to others. Whether it is family, friends, a coworker, or someone you don't know. Show that you care. Buy a gift for someone you no has no one to buy them anything. Volunteer your services at a shelter, hospital, or nursing home. When you are a blessing to someone else, you are a blessing to yourself, whether you're in a relationship or not.